Isaiah 40:31

Isaiah 40:31 "But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint."

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Quit Watching the Squirrels

That was quite a hook!  Basically getting out of your boat is to trust God with your life.  Just as Peter trusted Jesus in the midst of that horrific storm, to step out of that tossing boat and walk on the water to meet his Lord, we should trust God to use the gifts and talent He has given us to use in our service to Him.  God has called me to write; I am sure of it.  The issue is, I have no time to write.  I have excuse, after excuse, after excuse!  I have a job that takes so much of my thought and consumes my time.  I bring work home with me, then I feel guilty for not getting it done at school because the work I bring home takes me away from my FOUR children and husband.  Really, how would I find time to write?  Excuses, excuses!  Even now, the last blog was posted over a quick lunch as students were arriving to my classroom.  Now, I have insomnia and it is 4:02 in the morning (after tossing around in bed listening to my husband snore for the last two or three hours).
So here I sit, buried under blankets and a computer typing away- and thinking - I should be working on those two IEPs on my desk - I really need to paint the living room - I should get the angel costumes for the Christmas program ironed...  There is ALWAYS stuff to be done.  That's when we must stand up and shout:  "GET THEE BEHIND ME SATAN!!!!"  Just tell Satan to shut up and go away!  We don't use the word 'shut up' in our house, but for some reason I don't feel bad when I tell Satan to 'shut up'.  Am I wrong  on that?  You wouldn't naturally think that it was Satan telling you to go iron angel costumes, but what you have to remember is that he will use whatever he has in his arsenal to derail you from the work God has lain out for you.  God's plan is the optimum plan for our lives and will work toward 'vanquishing the foe' - Satan does not want that to happen.  So if he wants me to continue to be discouraged about my writing, to continue to feel useless and inadequate for the task God has set me to do - - - then yes - - he will use the ironing of angel costumes to distract me.  What I know, is that this is the time I can sit and let my thoughts cram themselves into the words on this page (everyone is asleep and I am actually focused), time like this is rare in my life - yet those angel costumes will get ironed - they certainly do not need done now.  And the IEPs, I left them at school on purpose!  So hahahhaha Satan, its not gonna work!!
Now there is the question I am plagued with - who am I to interpret God's plan for me?  Frankly that may just be one of Satan's squirrels, (sent to derail us from our purpose as the sighting of a squirrel can derail any dog from its purpose of the moment) but that is a large and particularly fractious squirrel!  I suppose my thought process works like this - whenever pastor speaks on using our gifts, not forsaking what God has tasked us with - my brain does not return to my chosen work - it goes to the unfinished book I have worked on - it goes to the unpublished bible study - the unillustrated children's book - my mind heads straight for the unknown people I could reach through my words (which aren't necessarily my words, before I write any of it - this included - I prayed that God's words would flow through my fingertips or pen to do his purpose, to serve him.  I dedicate each pen (or keyboard) stroke to the Lord.  I do feel he answers that.  No, I am not claiming every word I type are gospel truths.  But I do feel that if you are reading this, God has something to say to you!  There is something here that God's wants you to hear.  It may be that you have your own boat to jump out of, or it may be you know how I can go about publishing my bible study, or it may be you have a gift from God that you are not utilizing to serve him, or even possibly that you should read that book I mentioned in my last post (If You Want to Walk on Water, You've Got to Get Out of the Boat - by John Ortberg), who knows.  I also know that we are charged with the responsibility to reach out to people.  To reach out and share our faith, and to introduce people to God.  The person God created here has more chance of completing that job through writing or art than any other media.  Whenever I pray about how I can serve God, I do not hear 'give more money' or 'go clean the church' or 'work at the soup kitchen'... I hear write, use your words, use your wit, use your faith, write, WRITE!!!!  I help people whenever I can, I teach kids with severe behavioral issues and severely handicapping conditions, I raise my kids (2 of my own, and 2 step-daughters - that's a whole different story) in the word of God, I organize the church Christmas program... I do all this stuff- but it is just stuff, but I am not writing.  Now I do need to clarify that I do feel raising my kids to have a strong faith of their own, keeping them in God's word, and on his path is of utmost importance!  Just as important of a calling as anything else I could ever do!  Probably the most important thing I can do!  What I am saying is that it is not enough.
My biggest fear (otherwise known as a squirrel) is that I am reading things wrong.  God has given me a brain to use.  My boat - that job that I enjoy- is my families livelihood.  It is our home, our food, our clothes, our tithe.  I can't just quit to give myself more time.  That would be stupid--- or is it just a squirrel keeping the mana away.  I can't run out and quit my job - although that is exactly what the disciples did - but we all must keep a watch for those cackling, fat, juicy squirrels that Satan sends our way.  Where is the line between God gave me a brain - and God gave me a job to do?  I haven't found it.  And I firmly believe that that line is different for everyone.
Think about your gifts, your talents that God has given you.  Pray about your service to God.  Tell Satan to 'shut up' and go away. And don't forget to avoid the squirrels!

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